So the Boston Globe
is for sale. Again.
Look, I'll tell you what's wrong with the newspaper
business.
The first thing that's wrong is they're hiring kiddos who don't
know grammar. Between semi-literate reporters and equally
grammatically inept copy editors, it's a wonder news people can throw a
sentence together without futzing it up, which appears to be rarely.
The second thing that's wrong with the industry is that it
raised prices too high. Newspapers were
overpriced at 50 cents just a few short years ago. Now that they're somewhere in the vicinity of
$2+ per paltry paper, they've priced themselves out of the daily market. If they're hemorrhaging money, raising prices
on the consumers who keep them in business is suicide, slow and sure-fired suicide.
Another thing wrong with the newspaper business is that
people don't read their news from paper sources anymore. They read it online or on their phones. Why buy the paper cow if you get the endless
ink for free? Those (hint hint - Boston Globe) who even so much as
belched that they were going to charge for access to their websites, shot themselves
in your proverbial feet. Ouch, and duh,
all at the same time there, kiddos.
But the thing that really sunk the Boston Globe is its smugness.
The Globe is a puke bucket for
the liberal media. Now don't go judging
me. I'm not fan of the conservative
opposition, the Boston Herald,
either, but there's a huge difference between these rival papers that goes
beyond political bents.
You see, the Herald
is a paper that reports the news, caters to blue collar workers, and leans to
the right. The Globe is a propaganda mouthpiece for the political elite who
masquerade as working class (Kennedys and Kerrys and Warrens and Moores),
bleeds socialism, and sometimes throws a news piece in between its op-ed
leftist chanting. I dislike both
newspapers, but I dislike the Globe a
lot more these days. Reading the Herald is like reading a research paper
on Reaganomics; reading the Globe is
like reading a translation of Mein
Kampf.
A local auto dealer is trying to buy the Globe.
While he's a fun-loving dude on TV in his ads, he owns a llama farm on
Martha's Vineyard and sips Asti with the nouveau riche. There's no doubt his intentions are more to
keep the propaganda presses running than to actually report serious news. I mean, without the Globe's stellar reporting, we'd never know that Elizabeth Warren
speaks eighty tongues of Cherokee, that the Massachusetts Welfare system has
zero cheats, or that John Kerry is secretly a woman in disguise. (I believe they also reported about space aliens
living in Western Massachusetts, and that Elvis had been spotted stuck to the
seat of a marble-sculpted port-a-potty in Louisburg Square.)
So, the Boston Globe
is up on the chopping block yet again.
This time may it rest in piece, once and for all.
