THE WEATHER OUTSIDE IS FRIGHTFUL

I am frigging disgusted.

That's right, you heard me... read me.  Disgusted.

Tuesday was supposed to be nice weather.  Even in the morning the weather people were saying, "High 57 to 60 today!"  These people, with the technology up their asses and the high-density radar and the Doppler and computer models and forecasting tools that surpass the Red Bull Jump From The Edge Of Space, are a bunch of tools.

How in the fuck can they make such a stupid mistake?

I mean, it's bad enough that they predict two feet of snow, and we get a dusting.  Or they predict a dusting, and we get the goddamned Blizzard of '78.  (Okay, that's an exaggeration.  For the Blizzard of '78, they actually predicted a little bit of snow.)  Mis-predicting where a hurricane will make landfall is almost forgivable.  Almost.  But really ... Hurricane - Land - Hurricane - Land - Hurricane - Land.  Pick a fucking spot and be done with it.  Throw a dart.  That's about as accurate because these forecasters, these professionals, don't know a thing.  Not one goddamn thing.

How can so many people be so damn wrong about the temperature?  THE TEMPERATURE?!  49, people.  49.  It was 49 frikking degrees when I got out of work at 2:45 Tuesday.

Let me do some simple math for the idiot weather people:

49 NOT = 60  NOT.  EQUAL.  NOT EQUAL.

If I seem a little stressed, it's because I was counting on it being 60.  I mentally needed 60.  I deserved 60.  I earned 60.  I prayed for 60.

Forty-flipping-nine.  Four-niner.  Forty plus nine.  Fifty minus one.  Sixty less eleven.  Eleven.  ELEVEN.  That's the damn difference between a beach day and long pants.

Honestly.  What the hell is the matter with these news stations that they keep paying professionals to be WRONG?

That's it.  Not watching the weather anymore.  I'm going to wake up in the morning, look outside, and predict what the weather actually is.  I'm going to look outside at night and predict that it's dark.  And I'm going to be a television weather person like Ollie Williams:  "It's gonna RAIN!"

I'm going to give up The Weather Channel cold turkey!

Oh wait.  I already have.  Because ... I discovered the Weatherscan channel ... and that shows the radar 24/7.  Sorry, Jim Cantore.  You may get all excited by thundersnow, but I'd rather just watch the radar myself than get lied to by the pros.

You weather people suck.