FRESH AIR AND THE MUCK WALK

I don't know why, but after work today I decide to take a walk.  That's right, a walk.  Outside.

I know ... THE HORROR.

I hate Fridays because I'm always exhausted, but, for some reason (probably my ever-ballooning weight) I decided that today would be a good day to get my fat ass back outside and do myself some good.  After all, it's a mild 33 degrees out, no wind, overcast -- a perfect day to be outside.  Plus, there's almost zero snow on the ground.

My intention is to go up the street, down the long connecting street, and double-back the somewhat dangerous, semi-secluded back road that leads exactly one-half mile back to my house.  Instead, I do part of my usual (when I actually DO walk regularly) route straight uphill for one mile, turn at the campus museum, and turn down a side street, skipping out on the extra half-mile through the small cemetery. Sorry, Harriet Beecher Stowe, but I just don't have the stamina to visit you and the fam today.

The best part about this route is that almost the entire second half of it is downhill.  Sometimes (I mean to say "in the summer when I sometimes do this semi-routinely") I jog most of the way home (about a mile), but today I am a little overdressed for a jog, plus I'm rusty and pudgy. 

The worst part is that there are sections of this particular circuit without sidewalks.  I am surprised to find parts of the existing sidewalk still covered in melting snow and ice, which puts me into the street for a while.  Where the sidewalk ends (not Shel Silverstein -- I mean the "for real" sidewalk), I have to sling through some mud and muck to prevent being run down by cars and trucks that occasionally happen to fly by.

I end up doing 2.46 miles despite the whole affair being a whim and me being woefully out of practice.  Of course, I have to reward myself with tuna on a bulky roll, some homemade peanut butter granola oat bars, a salad, and two light beers -- far exceeding the calories shed.

That's okay, though.  I walked, I got fresh air, I didn't get run over, and I was damn-well going to eat that shit anyway.