Thursday, June 16, 2016

DRIVING UP TO THE TELLER

The other day I'm at the bank.  Usually I go inside or go to the drive-up ATM.  Today I have to hit the regular drive-up.

I like the drive-up teller station.  I like hitting the button and watching my bank errands whoosh away, up and over the parking lot into the arms of the human teller behind the tinted glass hundreds of yards away.  It used to be that an audio exchange would happen, then, VOILA, the money would shoot back at me all nice and impersonal.

Now, though, there are little computer screens at the drive-up stations.  Suddenly, I am face-timing with the guy at the bank.  The teller they put here is super-friendly.  And I do mean SUPER friendly.  He is upbeat, energetic, and efficient.  If he could send his energy through the screen or back through the machine with my money, I probably wouldn't need to sleep for a week.

The other interesting thing about the human-computer teller is that he can cheat on me, and it doesn't even faze me.  I can overhear his conversations with the car in the lane to my right and the car on the right of that car.  Teller guy is equally pleasant and charming to us all, and he is adept at juggling us separately and collectively.

When my transaction is done and we say our good-byes, the screen suddenly goes blank.  Teller Guy vaporizes, yet I hear his voice lingering near my car as other patrons interact with him.  I look once more at the mini-screen, perhaps wondering if he will reappear, but all I see is a gray-scale version of my own reflection.