The problem is that these are expensive shoes. Well, not expensive to me because I bought them off the DSW clearance rack, but essentially these are expensive shoes. They're Merrells, so they probably retail around $75, but, if I know me, I paid $30 or less. Still. These shoes ... these Merrells ... shouldn't be squeaking.
That's just bullshit.
However, bullshit or not, I don't want to return them; I want to wear them.
I tell a pal about my expensive, squeaky shoes. I tell her the same thing I'm telling you: "They're Merrells! Merrells, for crying out loud." (This is code-speak for "I paid more than Wal-Mart prices, and I expect shoes that don't squeak!") She tells me that her husband had squeaky sneakers and that she had some good shoes that squeaked, so she consulted a small, independent shoe store for advice.
Of course I forget all about the recommendation until I decide that today is the day I will wear those shoes again. I put them on, secure the strap, and ... the noise is so loud, even on my carpeted floors, that I am seriously afraid of waking my son, who is sleeping in the room across the hall from where my squeaky shoes and I are getting ready to leave for work.
I decide to try the powder trick. I generously put baby powder under the foot pad, reconstruct my shoe, and take a step.
Not much squeak.
I walk some more, down the stairs, around the kitchen. My shoes squeak some, but it is definitely better than before. I grab a container of Gold Bond medicated powder, pull up the heel part of the foot pad, shoot in generous pops of powder, and reassemble the shoes once more.
Silence. I swear to you: SILENCE. My squeaky shoes are completely soundless.
This is wonderful news since I must walk around my classroom while the kiddos listen to an audio version of a chapter from a novel. I can sneak up on them, rather than "squeak" up on them, to check if they're reading along in the text.
Even better than being in cognito, my shoes smell fabulous thanks to the baby powder, and my feet feel great thanks to the Gold Bond powder ... and the Merrells. Cannot forget the Merrells.
