DESK-BUILDING SUCCESS STORY

I need a new computer desk.  I've needed a new desk for about four years, and three years ago I bought one on sale.  It needs to be built.  I am terrible at building things because I can't translate the step-by-step visual directions, and I am mechanically incompetent.  So, for three years, the box with the desk in it has been stashed under a futon, collecting dust and generally making fun of me.

I keep hoping someone will help me build the desk, but the competent people are not here long enough -- an hour here, a couple of hours there.  This desk is going to be a marathon building session.  I keep telling myself that I am a competent person, but I also know that my biggest weakness is spatial-mechanical.  Couple that with being so directionally challenged that I cannot find my way out of a paper bag, and this is a recipe for disaster.

Finally, though, I open the box.  I carefully unload everything, making sure that I have all the parts, and making sure that everything is in alphabetical order (so I can find it easily).  Then I get sidetracked, and the desk parts sit a few weeks (okay, months, to be honest) leaning up against another piece of furniture in my den. 

I am determined to build this damn desk, even with its moving parts.

Even though all the parts are here, no tools have been included, so I promptly retrieve my screwdrivers and a hammer from a closet I cleaned out (while putting off building this desk).  Everything seems to be in order except the glue for the pegs; it's a very small tube, and I'm not sure there will be enough glue to complete the project. 

See?  I haven't even started yet, and already I am admitting defeat.

It takes me hours and lots of sweat and tons of swearing, but the desk slowly takes shape.  I only make one mistake (part D - the desk top), which I quickly rectify before any glue dries, and I only shear off one piece of the particle board, which is in the back, so I repair it with glue then cover it with silver duct tape.  Even though the drawings are not completely honest, and even though I sometimes have to turn the directions upside down and sometimes turn myself upside down, somehow the structure I am creating looks similar to the structure drawn into the booklet.  Even the keyboard tray works correctly.  Bonus: I use exactly the amount of glue in the container.

I have to move some furniture around, which reveals my horrible housekeeping skills as dust bunnies the size of snow leopards come bounding out from the floorboards.  When it's all put back together, though, it doesn't look half bad.  I actually feel pretty damn good about myself for the moment. 


Hours (and a few beers) later: SUCCESS.