I choose today because I figure since it's an absolutely spectacular day (mid-80's, sunny, slight breeze), no one will want to be inside waiting in a line at the cable company. Not only is the weather forecast an important factor, I also wait until 2:00 in the afternoon (post-lunch rush and pre-after-work rush).
There is a delicate science to this. Anyone who has been stuck in line at the cable company (or the Registry or a public bathroom at a sporting event or the Enchanted Village, for that matter) knows exactly what I mean.
When I pull into the parking lot, there aren't too many cars, and all but one of the front row spaces are wide open. I back in, grab the box containing two modems, one cable box, and my check for this month, and I prepare for battle.
Several people are leaving as I arrive and there is a pack of wild children swarming the double door entry. Not a good sign, I tell myself. With the large cardboard box under one arm, I swing open the final glass door with my other arm.
Except for one elderly woman, there isn't a single other person in line. The woman nods to the number machine. "Better take one!" she teases me, waving her numbered paper at me.
There are three clerks behind the counter, but only one of them is working. An elderly man shuffles in and cuts in front of me, but it's okay. He sidles up to the elderly woman, and it's obvious they're a couple. We three chat each other up, joking about the "big crowd" and the length of time we have to wait (about 90 seconds) to be assisted.
Finally, a second clerk opens up, takes my check for the monthly cable fee (might as well save a stamp; I'm here, after all), processes the cable box return, and checks in the modems. Total time: about four minutes.
Amazing. No Comcast/Xfinity Hell for me today. My planning works! Yes, small things like this please me. Anyone who has tried interacting with Comcast/Xfinity via telephone knows exactly what a victory I have scored today.
