The local weather on TV tells me that the temperatures will be rising during the afternoon and evening following a day of snow and sleet. "Rain," it claims, "with temperatures rising into the 40's."
It rains while I shovel the driveway after work, making the snow weigh about as much as concrete, but sleet has clearly taken hold by the time I finish. I feel it pinging off my forehead and hear it gently dinging off my car.
Pissah. I need one damn thing at the store: turkey for sandwiches. No worries. The temperatures are rising, right? I'll go right now to avoid the crazies at the store shopping pre-storm tomorrow.
I step outside, expecting rain and warmer temperatures, but it's a chilly 31 degrees, and my car is caked solid with ice. Instead of letting the car idle and start defrosting, I scrape, scrape, scrape, scrape, scrape the ice off the windshield and side windows.
The roads are much sloppier this evening than they were mere hours ago, almost like all the plow drivers are in the midst of siestas. The store is just over a half-mile from my house, and I decide to buy turkey and bread and eggs and hamburgers and hamburg buns. This whole shopping trip including check-out is maybe fifteen minutes in-store.
When I get outside, I notice my car is iced over again. I turn on my vehicle and check the temperature, which goes from 31 degrees, to 29 ... 28 ... 27 ... It doesn't take long for the temperature to settle in at 24 degrees in the half-mile to and from the store.
Okay, weather people, I have already proven time and again what absolute dopes you can be, but this is dangerous. My kid is out there driving around to and from lacrosse because you said it would be in the 40's. We believed you. Damnit, weather channel, how many times do you have to be wrong before I catch on?
By the way, weather channel: Can you do something about the impending snowstorm . . . ? I mean, I figure by now you must owe me at least ONE.
