Still, though. I need something. Something sweet. All I can find are Dum-Dums.
You know what Dum-Dums are; they're those small, round, totally horrible lollipops that come in flavors like grape and pineapple and sour apple. I remember that my favorite has always been the root beer flavored Dum-Dum.
What a surprise! There's a root beer flavored Dum-Dum right on the top of the pile!
I unwrap the lollipop and realize it's not as dark colored as I remember it. Oh, well, it's still root beer flavored, right? I taste it.
I attempt to finish the lollipop. After all, Dum-Dums are small, itty-bitty versions of what a Tootsie pop would be if it were a miniature piece of crap and minus its chewy center. I cannot finish it, though. There seems to be a saccharine aftertaste that's actually nauseating me.
This is what I get; this is what I deserve. If I am going to scour the kitchen in search of something sugary-sweet to quell what is truly a chocolate craving, then I deserve every agonizing taste of that Dum-Dum.
Never again! Never, ever again!!!!
Until I'm craving chocolate again with only Dum-Dums standing between me and my car, with which I will drive to the nearest 24-hour pharmacy and buy out every bag of holiday candy left on the shelves. I'm far too exhausted to drive up the street and stand in line for anything at this point. I look around one last time. Oh, well. All I can find are Dum-Dums.
Here we go again.
