WASP WATUSI

Today I put on a mini show at the beach. Nope, I don't have a wardrobe malfunction.  I have an attack wasp after me.

As soon as I emerge from the water, where I have been entertaining myself floating and getting smacked by the waves, a large black wasp dive-bombs me.

I wave my hand first, and this just pisses it off.  I start waving my arms around, and it starts swooshing back and forth through my hair.  An older gentleman walking by starts laughing, so I run next to him and take off for my chair, calling behind me, "There!  It's my gift to you!"  He flails his arms as the giant insect buzzes around him.

I sit in my canvas chair, reading a book and minding my own damn business, when the killer wasp returns.  My book instantly goes into the air, and I thrust the paperback at the wasp as if this really might make any difference.  I stand up and dance around, ducking and jumping and swearing my head off.  This motherfucker truly is out to kill me.

As I am dancing away, old people next to me start laughing.  Dangerous move, folks, because now I'm sending the killer your way.  As soon as I see them all motioning with the arms and jumping out of their chairs, I drag my stuff away from them and and the insect and enjoy a peaceful rest of the morning.

Make fun of me doing the Wasp Watusi?  Ha!  No problem--

I'M HAPPY TO SHARE.