The News - Part II:
I want to speak to the Boston news stations, since they were
on my mind this weekend. I have some
advice for all of you.
The first piece of advice is for NECN. Please allow Scott Montminy to be seen on
camera. He's funny as hell, and he makes
me smile. Why on earth you ever
relegated him to voice-overs is beyond me.
Bring him out and parade him around, t-shirt and all; the man has
charisma and a wry sense of humor.
Embrace him.
Another tidbit for NECN - Matt Noyes is never wrong with his
weather predictions. Never. Ever.
The man is a radar magician and a meteorological genius. Whatever you're paying him, it cannot
possibly be enough. Cage him and make
sure he never leaves the studio, or perform some kind of brain sharing thingee
so all New England weather people can thrive on whatever makes this guy tick.
WMUR in Manchester - You've come a long way from Manchester Coal & Oil jingles and
the likes of the Uncle Gus show
(which I was on once, by the way, when I was seven). Whatever you're doing, keep doing it. I travel in New Hampshire a lot more often
than I get to Boston, so you really have become my go-to-station lately.
Hey, WCVB, I don't care how many times Randy price gets
arrested; the man is still handsome. Let
him anchor, for crying out loud. And
don't ever allow married couples to co-anchor your show. Natalie Jacobson was a twat.
WBZ, this isn't the Our
Gang show. Tell Robie we love him,
but he has to stop the schtick; he's really not that good at it. Keller, I used to hate you because your voice
grated on me and your mustache never moved, then I loved you because your blog
had integrity, then you allowed those stupid bitches to take over your blog so
I hate you again. May Mumbles Menino
haunt your eternal unrest. And for
goodness sake, tell those women to eat something. Seriously, eat a marshmallow
or something. A couple of them look like
they'll choke on a mini-chocolate chip.
Have some food or lettuce or something.
You look like gerbils on screen.
Lastly, please do NOT continue dressing the female anchors in the same
color then putting David Wade in a matching tie. It's like watching Tony Orlando and Dawn, for
chrissakes.
Fox, I was never a big fan of VB. He and Sandy both sounded like fingernails on
a chalkboard when they worked for the Howie Carr radio show. (Sandy is still there and still makes me
twitch when she speaks.) But VB,
sometimes you act like Robie's (WBZ) goofy younger brother. You need your own persona. Or maybe the two of you just need to
re-integrate. I'm not sure which.
WHDH, you escape my wrath tonight. Well, mostly.
I will say your website is annoying, but your weather radar online works
pretty decently, so I guess you can have kudos.
But it seems like even though you have a comment section to your site,
no one ever comments. What's that all
about? Okay, so I guess you didn't
escape my wrath.
That's my advice. Now
it's time for the news, so I'll back tomorrow.
Film at eleven.
