TACO TOILET SIGNS AND THE SNEAKER CAPER

My friend and I are on an afternoon road trip adventure when we both realize that it has been a while -- a long while -- since we peed. We have more errands to run, including adding one more gang member to our shenanigans, so we set our sights on the nearest public restroom. We are on a busy multi-lane street with no safe crossings, so we are trying to limit our choices to major intersections with traffic lights or something on our side of the road.

Like magic, Taco Bell appears around the corner. 

The place isn't very busy for midday on a Saturday, which makes parking easy. We pull right up to a space near the entrance and clamber out to make haste to the potty. Except, of course, we are instantly sidetracked because strange things seem to happen when we are out together exploring. 

Despite a genuine need to get to the bathroom, we are distracted by a shoe. Not just any shoe. A sneaker. Not just any sneaker. A lone burnt-orange sneaker sitting all by its lonesome on the sidewalk right outside the door to Taco Bell.

Of course we take a picture of it. That's part of today's adventures, the whole documentation and proof piece of it all. But this just seems strange. Is it a worker's shoe? In which case, is an employee walking around with one bare foot? Or, did someone run so fast to get food that they simply ran right out of their own shoe? Even more frightening, was the shoe leftover from a patron whose Taco Bell lunch simply caused him to literally blow right out of his own footwear?

We find this shoe weird but also humorous, which is a dangerous thing for women in desperate need of restroom. We make our way to the bathroom corner of Taco Bell and discover two things: The ladies' room is a single-seater (horrifying), and the gender signs are hilarious. Naturally, while one of us is using the facilities, the other snaps pics of the placards.

Both bathroom gender signs are modernistic geometric designs, and both are clever and clear. The designs start with two long hooks. For the men's room, the hooks are crossed in the middle, indicating waist and hips leading to long legs, and the top curves of both hooks appear to be brawny shoulders. On top is a small circle. Apparently, only bulked-up men with tiny heads can use this potty.

The women's sign, on the other hand, takes the hook design to another level. The tops of the hooks represent delicate shoulders and arms, and a triangular design for a dress provides the assumption of gender. However, and this is the part the suddenly sends me into a giggling fit in Taco Bell while waiting for my friend to emerge from the bathroom: The pattern is designed in a way that the poor young lady's legs are crossed, presenting an image of someone who really, really, really needs to pee.

Now that we have caused a bit of a stir taking a photo of the sidewalk and also photos of the bathroom doors, my friend and I quickly and quite audibly (because we are howling with laughter) sneak-er our way back to the car, wishing that perhaps we were not so close to the entrance nor within eyesight of the entire (possible semi-shoeless) staff.