Signs like this should not be necessary:
"Do not drink drain clog gel."
"Refrain from sticking body parts into animal cages."
"Rat poison is not candy."
"Do not cross the road in traffic."
"Do not stick your mouth over the car tailpipe."
I think I may have encountered the ultimate example of human stupidity. Well, via signage, anyway. And I am still trying to figure out who on this crazy planet we call Earth could have attempted this so that a sign would ever be necessary.
I am at a hotel -- a newer, lovely Marriott in an area full of shops and restaurants and all kinds of cool places within walking distance. The hotel is mid-range financially, so I doubt there will be silverfish in the bathroom, and any available room service will not be delivered with white gloves. It's clean, it's modern, it's quiet, it's very comfortable, and it has some higher-end amenities.
I really like the bathroom. It has a huge walk-in shower with a decent-sized rainfall showerhead, and there is a pass-through shelf where I can leave a rolled-up towel (or, I suppose, a mixed drink). I have tons of towels, considering that it's just me. I have plenty of room on both sides of the sink to set up my make-up and earrings on one side, and my dental stuff and hair stuff on the other. There is a huge light-up mirror over the sink along with an adjustable table-top magnifying mirror, too.
Therein lies the rub.
It is the adjustable mirror that first catches the problem with the bathroom. I see something over my shoulder but, because the mirror is at an angle, the view is actually of the ceiling. I stand and peer into the light-up mirror over the sink and catch a glimpse of the same thing but from a slightly different angle. Finally, I turn around and stare up at the top of the bathroom.
There is a fire sprinkler head in the ceiling. No big deal, right? I mean, that's where the thing belongs, in case of fire. It's not the sprinkler itself that is the curiosity. It is the sign that is stuck on the ceiling next to it: "Contact with sprinkler will cause flooding." Still not a problem, correct? I have seen a soccer ball smack into a sprinkler head at an indoor arena and flood the entire sports complex, so it makes perfect sense to me.
That's right. A coat hanger.
This means that some moron in a Marriott hotel somewhere decided to suspend clothing on a hanger from the sprinkler head, probably even spun it around for fun, and proceeded to flood an entire hotel because once the system is triggered . . .
Please, people, if you are that incredibly stupid, please, please, please stop breeding. Stop reproducing. Stop sending your spawn to public schools. Just. Stop.
Stop, so that the rest of us can continue to experience the little hotel amenities that we have come to enjoy, like clean rooms and bathrooms with running water. Stop making signs like this necessary. And to the sign makers, please start producing signs that the rest of us can truly appreciate:
"If you don't know that this is NOT a coat rack, please drink this poison, stick your head in this tiger cage, or run across the track at a motor speedway."
