All it takes is a calendar change; not a weather change, not a temperature change, not even a change in any of the vegetation. As soon as the calendar says "Spring," I start sneezing. Oh, I try kidding myself. I tell myself that I must be finally catching a cold, perhaps even that nasty sinus-flu that has been ripping through the entire community.
Nope. Not the dreaded cold nor flu.
How can I tell? Cold-related sneezes use sneak-attack techniques: I can feel them coming on, sneaking up with full force before they happen. Sometimes I even get the sniffles first. On the contrary, allergy-related sneezes come out of nowhere. By the time I realize I might sneeze, I am halfway through a bout of five, six, seven sneezes, some of which I cannot even catch a breath between, and I hyperventilate and spew snot all at the same time.I don't get it, though. There's still snow on the ground. It's still cold enough to defrost my car's windshield in the morning. There isn't a bud in a tree nor a crocus popping out of the ground. For crying out loud, I still have ice skates, snowshoes, and a snow shovel in my car. It cannot possibly be spring enough yet to send my allergies into overdrive.
Yet, amazingly enough, here it is; here they both are, spring and allergy season. The ground may not be ready, the temperature may not be ready, and I may not be ready, but the calendar rules us all. Will it snow again before true New England spring has sprung? Probably, maybe even three or four more times.
Doesn't matter.
My nose thinks it's spring because the calendar thinks it's spring. The spore-pollen invasion has begun! I may not be able to see it, smell it, or feel it, but, by god, my nostrils will not be denied. Bring it on, Spring! I'm already suffering; you might as well just finish me off with your warmth and beauty.
Damn you.
